Preparation & Motivation

This is Tennessee week. You know that. This is what I came to the University of Florida for - to lead my team against the best of the best, against the SEC. So it's make or break time for our season and our number 1 goal of winning the SEC again. Losing is not an option as that would put us basically 2 games behind those checkerboarded rednecks. As Coach Meyer says "Lose and we're screwed." Except well, he uses the F-word instead. As if we didn't hate Tennessee already, it's really getting pounded into our head this week. There's the big orange T's in all the urinals, and newspapers of all the close, bullshit losses to Tennessee plastered all over the walls (1998, 2001, 2003). Pardon my french, but this game gets me all wound up. Coach Meyer does NOT want this game to be close because funny things can happen, so he put up all those newspapers as a reminder of that fact.

Also, this year we added something new. Ever see the movie Major League? Well that kind of inspired this one. We've got a cardboard cutout of Phil Fulmer in the locker room and he's holding a big food tray. Any time a player makes a good play in practice they get to slap a donut sticker on the tray. On Saturday, all good plays will earn a big piece of chocolate cake sticker to also add to the tray.

Our team nutritionists estimate Fulmer's current weight to be about 422 lbs. After the game, they'll be doing all their calculations factoring in the calories of each donut & piece of cake that we feed him to figure out a new weight for the big fatty. Our goal is to get Fulmer up to 450 lbs come Sunday. If that happens we believe enough plays were made for a solid victory over Tennessee. And judging by what's been going on in practice this week, 475 lbs might not be out of the question!

Lookout Tennessee we're coming for you and your fat ass coach too.

Survivorman

Practice was brutal today. Coach Meyer made me go up against two of the offensive lineman in the Survivor Pit. He'll throw me in there with the both of them and tell me to "beat their ass and punish those guys for being fat, slow pussies." You see Coach Meyer believes that only pussies allow their quarterback to get sacked. And I got sacked twice against Troy. So he makes me straighten them out sometimes in the Survivor Pit. If I don't get sacked against Tennessee, it'll be a good game.

But I hate really hate that pit. Going up against two 300 lb lineman at the same time gets me a little sore and I usually need a massage the next day. But I don't like those dude trainers rubbing my back. There's this girl in my sociology class that gives great back rubs, maybe I'll ask Coach Meyer if she can be allowed in the training room to take care of me instead.


Speaking of the Survivor Pit.....I really like that show Survivorman. Have you seen this show? It's on the Discovery Channel and they drop this guy, Les Stroud, off in the middle of nowhere to survive for a week. He films it all himself and has to lug the equipment around. So he has to build a shelter, hunt food and avoid the dangers.


It reminds me of the time in the Phillipines when I was 10 years old and dad brought me over to help start an orphanage. We went out into the middle of the jungle, rounded up a bunch of kids and built a home for them out of sticks, leaves & mud. I even built myself a sweet jungle tree house, but dad thought it was nicer than what some of the other kids had and made me share it.

So we literally had to "survive" out in the middle of this jungle. I remember one day, just as were were getting low on provisions and food, this tiger made it's way into the orphanage village and came after one of the kids. I didn't even have time to think and I just tackled the thing and wrestled it to the ground. I put that big cat in a sleeper hold and before long it was dead. We ate tiger for a whole week and believe me it does NOT taste like chicken. I knew then that God sent that tiger into the village and chose me to kill it so that we could all eat. It was awesome and God rocks!

First Half = Awesome. Second Half = Sucks.

Coach Meyer is pissed. He hasn't yelled at us after a game like that since Auburn last year. And I agree. We should have put 80 points on those guys. We were just killing Troy at halftime 49 - 7 but fell flat in the second half. I take full responsibilty. As the quarterback, I'm in charge of running the offense and we just didn't produce in the second half. While I got to run the ball more this game (93 yds and 2 TDs) the end result of the game was NOT pretty.

I woke up early this morning and went to break down film with Coach Mullen. A lot of work needs to be done as we've got a big week ahead. Tennessee is coming to town and now the real season begins. I just know it's gonna be a tough week at practice. It's time to get to work.

Game Night - Troy St

This was an interesting week at practice. On Monday Coach Meyer pulled me aside and said that while we're playing Troy this week, he really wanted me to start focusing on the Tennessee game and prepare this week like we were playing those hillbillies. We don't plan on showing too much in tomorrow's game against Troy, but the focus and intensity will be there. We want to focus on play execution. That has been the motto of the week.

Well tomorrow is a late game, a sixer. So as long as I'm awake by noon I should be in good shape. Tonight I'm going to a party with Bubba, Percy & TJ. I don't know what to expect, but they assured me there would be plenty of girls with "flava" and that I would have a good time. And why wouldn't I have a good time? I'm Tim Tebow, good times follow me everywhere.

See you tomorrow in the endzone.

Care Package

Got a care package from Kirk Herbstreit today. I know he's trying to bribe me so I'll hang out with him when they come to Gainesville this season. Last year after the LSU game, I told him to meet me at the Alpha Gamma Delta sorority house cause I lined up some hot girls for us. Boy was he surprised to find out it doesn't exist! I wonder how long he wandered around sorority row that night.

The package was a pretty good one. It included a few Superman comic books, a big batch of fudge swirl brownies (bet his wife made them), a 6 lb jug of Muscle-Tech Hardcore protein mix, and a photo of Kirk holding Troy Smith's Heisman trophy above a toilet, pretending to flush it down (that was T.Joiner's idea to make him do that). I still don't know if I want to hang out with him though. I asked him a long time ago to get me a pair of Erin Andrews' undies for my collection, knowing that would be impossible. Erin told me that she can't stand Kirk and pretends to be all chummy on the air cause it's good for ratings (keep that a secret). So obviously Herbie will have to steal a pair somehow, if he can pull that off then I'll really owe it to Kirk to let him tag along for a night. Otherwise I can probably pass Johnny Brantley off on him, I'm sure he'd love to hang out.

Looks like I'm not the only one Herbie has eyes for.

Word of the Day

I learned a new word today: Mangina. A mangina is apparantly a man with a vagina. I was working out, finishing my third set of bench pressing 415 lbs, but I was having a tough time getting the weight up. So strength coach Mickey Marotti calls me a "mangina" for some extra motivation. Except I didn't know what that was. Mom never covered that in our home-schooled sex ed classes. Well anyway, I think this is my new favorite word. It just rolls off the toungue. Say it - Man-Gi-Na. Feels good doesn't it.

I can think of at least 5 schools on our schedule that should change their mascot to a Mangina. Come Oct you can make that 6 and add LSU to the list. In fact the entire Big 10 should collectively change their mascots to a Mangina effective tomorrow (Ohio St can be retroactive to Jan 8!)

Well there you have it, my new word of the day. I'll probably be using it a lot in this blog so I wanted to give you guys a heads up.

Game 1 - The Day After

It was great to get back out onto that field yesterday. The stadium now says 2006 National Champions in the endzone and it just gets you so fired up when you look at it. And then to see all the fans, starting with the walk into the stadium, it was truly an awesome day! After that easy win yesterday I decided to go out to the Swamp for a little bit and see my people. I love that they don't card me at any of the bars in this town. Everybody knows who I am but I don't think they realize that I just turned 20 a couple weeks ago. After throwing for 300 yds and a few touchdowns I wasn't about to point this out to them.

Today was a good morning. When Katie & Stephanie woke me up for some morning lovin I thought that I smelled something really good. So I walked out into the kitchen and Megan was cooking some bacon, eggs & waffles. My favorite! I tried to wake TJ up for breakfast but he wasn't having it. He really loves to sleep in. His loss, I wasn't going to save him any, it was just too damn delicious.

Sorry to the fans for not being able to see a complete game yesterday. I can't believe mother nature came in and cut our game 8 min short. It was just a little lightning, that never stopped me before. I was struck by lightning during a Pop Warner game and still threw for 270 yards. But the SEC has it's rules so they called the game short. Even though I was already out of the game at that point, that really sucks!

I'd rate my game performance a 5 out of 10. I was barely trying and I think my stats kinda showed that - 13/17 for 300 yd, 3 TDs. 38 yds rushing 1 TD. Those 4 incomplete passes were unfortunate but sometimes those things happen. Just gonna have to work harder in practice this week. I really wish I could have run the ball more but Coach Meyer wants me to spread it around to our playmakers and keep me healthy. He says "everytime you run you're either going to kill somebody or kill our season if you get hurt." So I'm gonna have to try and do that a little less. Believe me it's a hard adjustment. When I see an opening and there's only 3 defenders in my way, I know I can just run over them and get us a first down. Those punk Hilltoppers even took a couple cheap shots at me. One guy on the bench gave me a little shove and like I told those reporters it was probably the hardest hit of the day.

All in all it's a good start to reaching our goals this season. It could be worse, you could be Chad Henne & Michigan this morning! I couldn't resist throwing that zinger in there, it's a little payback for them bitching about getting screwed out of the BCS last year. Yes we're still laughing at you guys in Ann Arbor. I think I'll polish my championship rings now.

Game Night

Tomorrow is our first game of the season and my first as the starting QB for the University of Florida Gators. Even though we are playing against Western Kentucky and we're probably going to drop 65 points on those clowns, I am so pumped for the game!

Gonna try and take it easy tonight. My roommate Tony Joiner (TJ) and I are probably just going to chill out, play some NCAA Football 2007 and watch my favorite movie Fight Club. Coach Meyer specifically told me no girls were allowed to come over tonight. He wants me well rested and fresh since it's an early game tomorrow.

So in a mere 18 hours I'll be leading my team, the DEFENDING NATIONAL CHAMPS, onto the field at The Swamp. It's gonna be awesome and I have all of the Gator Nation to thank for that. Take care and I'll see you tomorrow in the endzone!

The Start of Everything

My name is Tim Tebow. I play football and people often tell me that I'm kind of a big deal. I can't complain if football makes me a hero to some people! I just like to get out there and run somebody over or throw that ball as far as I can. I must admit that playing football at the University of Florida does have it's perks. Like last year when Coach Meyer would put me in the game to finish the job for Leak. Nothing is better than the coach calling your number when your team is on the 5 yard line to go jam it in the endzone. Sometimes you just have to pull a play out of your butt and throw a jump pass to get it done. That's what I'm all about - Getting It Done.

I also like the fact that I get a steady stream of girls sending me their underwear every week. My collection is now up to 312 pairs. I get them in all sizes, even a pair of old granny panties. Judging from my collection I'd say the average waist size of female Florida fans is a size small. Note to the ladies - I like those stringy thongs, the ones like dental floss, and if you could spray some rose smelling perfume on them that would be even better.

I live with senior safety Tony Joiner. Coach Meyer hooked us up toegether. I like living with Tony, probably cause he's black. Tony's always playing this cool rap music and stuff. It's a lot different than that Christian Rock mom & dad made us listen to. Tony is also a pretty sharp dresser so he gives me fashion tips. One of the freshman on the team, Chris Rainey, was recently quoted as saying he's a "white-woman man." Well let me say this - I am a black-guy man. And as long as we've got a lot of fast black guys for me to throw the ball to this is going to be a great season!

So this is a little blog I started to chronicle my season. I thought it would be a good way to connect with the fans. I'll be posting stuff on here from time to time, some football related and some not. I hope you enjoy what you read. If you've got any good ideas for football plays I can pass them along to Coaches Meyer and Mullen. God Bless and Go Gators!